Your Dog Is Watching You More Than You Think

My brother Shane joined me on Instagram Live last Saturday and we ended up covering a lot of ground — new client lessons, puppy management, why crates are non-negotiable, and how your energy shapes your dog more than you probably realize. Here's a breakdown of everything we talked about.

The New Puppy Client: Where We Always Start

I had a first lesson this week with a family that just brought home a five-month-old puppy. They've also got an eight-year-old dog, two cats, and a house that was suddenly a lot more chaotic than it used to be.

The older dog is a good dog — naturally decent, nothing dramatic — but she's chased a herd of elk and a black bear before, so she's not off-leash trustworthy. Now they've got this puppy constantly misreading her cues and trying to wrestle her. The older dog is rightfully annoyed.

Here's the thing I told them: your older dog was there first, and she doesn't have the same problems the puppy has. Right now, the puppy needs more management — not because he's bad, but because he doesn't know anything yet. The goal is to build his skills fast enough that he can earn more freedom.

The prescription for week one:

1. Leash in the house. The puppy doesn't have the skills yet to have free reign. If he can't be redirected, he can't be trusted. Leash on, managed, period.

2. The marker system. This is how we build communication with a dog that literally doesn't understand anything yet. "Good" tells the dog they're on the right path. "Yes" marks the exact moment they do something right and releases them to get a reward. "Get it" sends them chasing a treat on the ground — which gets their nose working, which is its own form of enrichment. Five to ten minutes of this and a puppy is cooked. They laid the puppy down in the crate after our session and he was out almost immediately.

3. Play — specifically prey drive play. Tug. Chase. Teaching the puppy to hunt the toy. A dog that doesn't know how to play is a dog whose energy has nowhere to go. We're not just entertaining them — we're teaching them how to hunt, how to engage, how to use that drive productively instead of pointing it at the cats or the older dog.

4. Crate more, not less. The puppy needs to be in his crate when he's not being actively trained or supervised. Not as punishment — as management. If he's not practicing the wrong stuff, the wrong stuff doesn't become a habit.

The Nose Thing (This Is Underrated)

Shane brought up something from the K9 Paradigm podcast that I think is worth sitting with: most dogs don't know how to use their nose because we inadvertently punish them for it.

Dog digs in the trash — we correct them. Dog sniffs too long on a walk — we pull them along. Over time, they learn: the nose gets me in trouble.

But their nose is how they understand the world. It's their primary sense. Memory, recognition, safety — it all lives there. That's why when you see a soldier come home in a video and the dog doesn't immediately recognize them, but then gets one sniff and goes absolutely wild — that's not a movie moment. That's biology.

The get it game is one of the simplest ways to reactivate that instinct. You toss a piece of food and the dog has to hunt for it. At first, if it goes out of eyesight, a lot of dogs just... stare at the ground and give up. They've forgotten to use their nose. But over time, with repetition and the yes marker when they find it, they start to figure it out. Confidence builds. Curiosity builds. And that dog who used to lock up at stimuli starts sniffing first instead of reacting.

Your Energy Is a Variable

Someone asked whether humans can unintentionally project emotions onto their dogs. Short answer: yes, constantly, and most people don't know they're doing it.

Shane made a great point — if you're someone who can't sit still, your dog probably can't sit still either. If you're anxious and pacing, they're anxious and pacing. They read the room. They mirror you. And then the interaction cycle reinforces it: they follow you around, you pet them because they're cute, and now the anxiety has a reward attached to it.

I went through this firsthand with my dog Oso. He was one of the most reactive dogs I've ever worked with — and early on, when he went to a 10, I went to a 10 right with him. Both of us spiraling. It took a long time to learn that when he goes up, I have to go to zero. Not fake calm. Real calm. Because I cannot help him if I'm in the same place he is.

Shane compared it to a surgeon in an emergency — they're probably freaking out internally, but they can't act like it. The ability to stay grounded under pressure is a skill. And like jiu-jitsu, it gets easier the more you train it. When you're a white belt, someone on your back trying to choke you out sends you into pure panic. Ten years in, you're in that same position thinking, okay, how do I move my hip here? You have the knowledge. You can access it under pressure.

Same thing with your dog. The more skills you build — yours and theirs — the calmer you'll be when things get hard.

On Keeping Your Dog's World Small (And What That Actually Means)

One of our viewers mentioned keeping their reactive dog's world small to set them up for success. I pushed back on the framing a little, because I think it can be misread.

It's not about restricting your dog's life. It's about being intentional with what you're asking of them given where their skills are. Take them to the park — but maybe stay in the parking lot instead of walking the whole trail. Go to the hiking spot — but work in a smaller area first. You're still doing the things you want to do. You're just doing them at the right edge of your dog's capability, not way past it.

And then you build. Six-foot leash becomes a 15-foot retractable becomes a 30-foot long line. Parking lot becomes the trail. The goal is expansion — but it has to be earned, and it has to be built on real skills.

The other piece: your home is your gym. So many people skip the work they can do inside because they assume dog training happens outside on a leash. But you can build enormous amounts of skill in your house, your backyard, your living room. Use it.

Crates — We'll Say It Again

Someone asked about switching from a crate to a pen for their seven-month-old puppy. The short answer: stick with the crate.

A pen gives the dog room to move, which means room to have accidents and room for energy to stay up. A crate tells the dog: it's off time. Most dogs will settle faster in a crate than a pen because there's less stimulation and less space to pace.

But here's the bigger point — crates are a permanent tool, not a phase. My dog Lucy is 12 years old and she goes in a crate every time I leave. Not because she can't be trusted. Because I can't guarantee I didn't leave a cabinet open, or that something won't happen. And if, god forbid, there's ever a fire in my house — first responders can pick up a crate. They can't corral a loose, panicked dog.

There's also the mental health angle. Dogs are both predator and prey animals, which means they're hardwired to monitor their environment for threats. They don't understand that the walls of your apartment mean nothing can get them. Every noise is potentially something. If your dog is loose and wandering, they're staying in that low-grade vigilance state constantly — and that can look a lot like anxiety.

A crate tells them: nothing is required of you right now. You can actually rest. Lucy sleeps so deeply she dreams. That's not just tiredness — that's a dog who knows she doesn't have to be on duty.

On Barking

Quick one to close: barking is almost always a symptom, not the problem itself.

Too much energy? The dog barks because the tank is full and nothing has drained it. Play more — a dog can't bark when they're genuinely tired.

Territorial barking at the door? That's natural. Work the marker system. Can you call their attention off the trigger? Can you redirect to a chase or a place command? If they're crated and barking, dump some food in the crate — sniffing is a natural calming behavior and a dog can't bark and sniff for food at the same time.

And if you have guests coming over, accept that training takes time. Tell your friends to wait. (Shane's advice: put a mini fridge outside with some beers. I think that's solid.)

We're doing this every Saturday at 11am. Come with questions — we'll be there.

– Ruben Kindred Dog PDX | @kindredogpdx